How not to give customer service and lose business

We’ve seen a lot of businesses failing. Of course, the economy puts a severe strain on economics, but how many businesses are really sabotaging themselves? So many companies seem to fall short of providing the basics and then complain when customers don’t flock towards them. Perhaps if we turn the tables around, although¬† bit tongue in cheek, there’s nothing like a bit of humor to help us realize potential foibles.

Here are the top ten reasons not to give excellent customer service:

  1. Treat your loyal and repeat customers badly. Use dishonest business practices.
  2. Do not have reasonable customer service policies. Don’t answer your phone. Have impatient and rude representatives. Allow employees to insult and yell at customers when customers get frustrated. Tell the consumer it is their fault. Never respond to inquiries.
  3. Never update your website. Make it hard to navigate, keep it boring, and confuse and lose your target audience.
  4. Just consider your clients as one-time sales. Always under estimate the value of your customer or client. Never worry about them referring your services or business to a friend. Who needs them?
  5. Overcharge for products and service.
  6. Offer inferior products and service.
  7. Do not update customers on delivery delays. On back orders or advance orders, you have probably been paid for the merchandise, so no big deal if their merchandise doesn’t get there on time. It will get there eventually. Don’t bother to update customers.
  8. Lie. Misrepresent if you have to by embellishment.
  9. Do not try to attract new business. Customers need you. Work on “bad” word of mouth.
  10. Don’t follow the law. You’ll be out of business if you get sued.

photo credit: Alyssa L. Miller